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Gun safety

I had two dad's growing up. This is old news but it sets the scene. Both my dad and my step-dad owned guns and were hunters. Both of their families were outdoorsy. Hunting, like high school sports, was just something you did in northern Michigan. You're a teen? You hunt and play football. Football I stuck with. Hunting I gave up after blowing one squirrel straight to hell.

The reason I mention all that is because in order to get a hunting license at 13 you needed to take and, of course, pass a gun safety class. The class was given in a classroom in the high school wing of the public school I attended. The class was given by the father of a kid I kinda knew. I was surprised when he walked in. It was one of those revelations about a person that strikes. I thought my dads knew a lot about guns. This kid's dad actually taught classes about guns!

I remember two things about the class. First, everything this guy went over my step-dad had already taught me. My opinion of step-dad went up a couple of notches. I remember thinking that my step-dad could probably have done a better job. I don't think it was a biased opinion because he and I never really gelled. Two trains running parallel with two miles of swamp between them.

The second thing I remember is still a vivid moving image in my head. Like all firearm instruction he pointed out to us that no gun is ever completely safe.

"No matter how careful you are in determining that a gun is not loaded and that the safety is on," he said, "it is never completely safe. Always treat a gun as if it is loaded."

While going through this routine he was using an old rifle to demonstrate the proper way to unload and clear a weapon. He was very careful to show is that the gun's safety was on. He then dropped the gun so that the butt hit the floor. It hit the ground and dry fired.

He said, "Did you notice that the gun fired? I did that to show you that a gun is never, ever completly safe. Now, I demonstrated that this way because this rifle has a safety that doesn't work. I haven't used it in years so I know it's safe."

Even as a dumb 13-year-old I knew what he had done contradicted everything he had said that evening. I have a third memory of that night now that I think about. I remember that my step-dad and I discussing the class while driving home in the early evening dark. He fouly expressed his disdain for the unsafe stunt of the instructor when I brought the incident up.

Bill Maher is funny again? When did this Happen?

"And finally, New Rule: You can't run on a mistake. Franklin Roosevelt didn't run for re-election claiming Pearl Harbor was his finest hour. Abe Lincoln was a great president, but the high point of his second term wasn't theater security. 9/11 wasn't a triumph of the human spirit. It was a fuck-up by a guy on vacation.

Now, don't get me wrong, Mr. President. I'm not blaming you for 9/11. We have blue-ribbon commissions to do that. And I'm not saying there was anything improper about your immediate response to the attacks. Someone had to stay in that classroom and protect those kids from Chechen rebels.

But by the looks of your convention, you'd think that the worst thing that ever happened to us was the best thing that ever happened to you. You just can't keep celebrating the deadliest attack ever as if it's your personal rendezvous with greatness. You don't see old men who were shot down during World War II jumping out of a plane every year. I mean, other than your dad.

But even your dad didn't run for re-election based on a recession and his propensity to barf on the Japanese. Now, I know you'd like us all to get swept away with emotionalism and stop sweating the small stuff like the deficit and the environment, and focus on what's really important: how you look in a fireman's hat. But crying during your speech? I mean, come on! There's no crying in politics! It's not fair! That's a trick chicks use. How are we supposed to discuss this rationally if you're going to cry?! There's a name for people who exploit their participation in historical events for political gain. They're called the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth.

So I say, if you absolutely must win an election on the backs of dead people, do it like they do in Chicago, and have them actually vote for you."

I tell ya, it's a crazy-mixed-up world when Dennis Miller turns into Rush Limbaugh and Bill Maher starts making sense.

Good and scared yet?

Our belived vice president speaks: "It's absolutely essential that eight weeks from today, on Nov. 2, we make the right choice, because if we make the wrong choice then the danger is that we'll get hit again and we'll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States."

Heartless money-grubbing bastards

I think this paragraph by David Poole that was printed in Today's Charlotte Observer perfectly displays the shitty attitude by the NASCAR brass: "Former NASCAR chairman Bill France Jr. was crowing that a story on NASCAR made the front page of
Los Angeles Times Sunday. Such a thing certainly would not have
happened, France said, if the circuit had been in Darlington, where it
had been on Labor Day weekend from 1950 to 2003. France told a
reporter to make sure he pointed that fact out to me in light of a
column I wrote for Sunday lamenting the loss of the Southern 500's
traditional date. Is it possible France really believes trading 54
years of history for one front-page story in the Los Angeles Times is
a good deal? If so, that's right sad."

If they weren't such obvious money whores all these stolen races and track closings in Carolinas would be easier to deal with. I may have said this before but they are correct in stating that Rockingham and Darlington don't sellout but, and this is a huge but, they have done nothing to help stimulate interest in the races held at these tracks. They didn't try to give them better dates. They didn't build any kind of entertainment facilities around. I belive it was the professional sports version of compassionate conservatism.

Cool, baby

Hey everyone, Neal Pollack is back. "The war in Iraq isn’t going as poorly as its critics imply. After all, not everyone is dead yet."

Dooty

I did my duty as an American last night and suffered through the speech by our swaggering president. He was heavy on the 9/11, bashed Kerry for wanting to tax and spend, mentioned a bunch of programs he wanted to start that would require spending, illogically stated he wanted to make his tax cuts permanent, avoided the deficit completely, once again said "we will prevail" and seemingly vowed to keep us at war against a strategy for the next four years. I'm sorry to say that it was an effective speech. It was all BS but it was good BS. I was hoping he would fall on his face but he didn't. The son of a bitch has learned how to give a speech. Dammit.

I was most impressed by the protestors. When was the last time something even remotely like that has happened? I thought it was beautiful.

Actual Sports Headlines that could be read as kinda dirty

Pats end preseason with blowout loss

No contact means no stopping some WRs

Welcome to the big time

Bryant trial may be gone but stench lingers

Ichiro moves closer to Sisler in loss

Greatest show on Earth

Jaguars shut out sloppy Patriots

Mix of young and old at Pebble Beach

Ladies European Tour allows transsexual players

Learn from Tiger

Hamilton Jr. takes over Craven's ride

Annus says he won't return gold medal

U.S. men left to wonder what went wrong

Stealing from the best

"This whole confab has been built around militarism, the seductions of the mentality of seige and insecurity both from without and within, and the sort of no-rules-win-at-all-costs-lie-if-it-works mentality that will lead this nation to grief."

Heads up

As a ten-year public library veteran I have come to realize that any phone call that begins with the patron asking your name is going to be a nightmarish exchange. Generally when they axe you your name they are then going to begin every sentance with your name as they attempt to dominate the phone call and turn a simple question that could be answered in 30 seconds into a ten minute ordeal.

Ah-nold

I tried to watch Arnold's speech last night but after his fourth movie reference in the first minute of his speech I turned it off. I am definately going to watch some of Cheney's speech tonight because that man can whup a crowd into a frenzy.