Oooga flort

The scratchy throat has evolved into a stuffy nose and a throat where one side is sandpaper and the other raw skin. My head a slightly congested ball of small pain that is too tired to digest the printed word and too distracting to sleep. I lay in my bed as my torso gets too warm and my uncovered head and feet get too cold. I pull the blanet over my head until it gets too warm. I throw the whole thing off until I get chilled again. I get up and take a snort of the Ny-Quil that neither Wendell nor I can decide where it came from. Strange, that it should sit there so long, unclaimed and unopened until my summer cold.

Back in my room I turn the light back off and those stupid glow-in-the-dark stars try and cheer me up. I think the Ny-Quil is working because the stars have an almost three dimensional feel about them. Or I could just be exhausted. I put on a bootleg Bob Dylan concert to pass the time. This one is from 1999 and it's a soundboard recording. Bob's voice, which sounds like my throat feels, is eerily high in the mix and soothing like an exfoliating sandstone.

I think I sleep but I don't know. I wake and get a drink of water. Go to the bathroom. Gross. I do sleep this time and I dream of someone I hadn't seen in years that I loved once. I dreamed I was reading her blog and she was recalling a concert we had been to and she had nice things to say about us but it was vague and I think I was projecting...

I sleep again and wake up among cats, one by my head and the other curled up in the my legs. In my confusion I almost roll over the one curled in the crook of my legs. I think he left I can't be sure. Around 5 a.m. I hear a strange sound. Like a banging from the bathroom. I investigate and find a cat in the bathroom. He is hungry now and so is the other. I feed them and then go back to sleep until my alarm goes off.

Tom Waits

Remarks like this show why I love Tom Waits so much: "You know what I really love? The CD players in a car. How when you put the CD right up by the slot, it actually takes it out of your hand, like it's hungry. It pulls it in, and you feel like it wants more silver discs. "More silver discs. Please." I enjoy that." From an interview on the Onion.

Ready Reference

We have a website we use at work that we use for what we call "ready reference." Kind of a FAQ reference thing. It's had a few different looks over the years and I revamped the site over the last couple of days. I think it looks better and is more "user friendly." You can view it here.

I'm on a roll tonight, man

Rarely do you ever get to read such a fine example of using fear and superstition to forward an agenda. Of course they don't tell you that the reason they want a Jewish state is so that the apocalypse will begin and those Jews they profess to support will eventually have to convert or die. But when you're an extremist what's a few million deaths just as long as you reach your goal?

Let me say this: Jennifer James you are a bad person. Every gullible person that reads the tripe you write and takes it as truth you will have to answer for when you pass on. You are tainting your essence. You would do your soul more good by smoking crack in a burnt out gas station and having sex with smelly bums for drug money rather than printing obvious lies disguised as news.

No means no. I said "no." I mean it. No, no, no! I mean it, no. I'm going home. I don't care what your side thinks. Wah, wah, wah!

The pigheadedness and inflexibility as shown in this interview with MPAA president, Jack Valenti, displays quite satisfactorily why everyday joes hate the MPAA and the RIAA.

I download one song. I listen to that song. I then delete it without sharing it or burning it to a CD. As far as they are concerned I am a thief. Everybody does this so everyone is a thief. Are these guys really that fucking dumb?

These guys are grasping at straws. All this talk by these people reminds of the braying of a wildebeast that has a crocodile's snout up its ass. Which, by the way, is no longer against the law in Texas and North Carolina. Rump bump bump.

A step in the right direction

Although this is a good thing I can't wait until the day that we no longer have to identify ourselves as black, white, gay, straight, donkey fucker or nude bread maker and can just say, "Howdy, I'm Fred. I'm a human being that lives across the street from you." We're eliminating bad laws so maybe we can soon eliminate the bad labels that lead to the creation of those laws.

Boys and their toys

I love high-speed photography. Check out the flash animation of the exploding grenade.

Ferret-faced weasel

Headline: Man praying against legalized sodomy has the appearance of someone being sodomized.

Ever notice how a lot of these christian whackos (besides being un-christlike) have these pinched faces and weak chins?

Dumbest thing ever?

Finally something made that makes the Kiss Kasket seem reasonable. I give you the Iraqi Freedom SUV. Excuse me while I laugh myself sick.

The funniest things I heard in Marine Corps bootcamp

10) Who woulda thought a weird fuck like you could shoot so goddamn good?
9) Left! Right! Left! Fucking Right! You get it!?!?! On 'left' you put your left foot down! On 'right' you put your fuckin' right foot down! Do you fucking get it? (He didn't)
8) Holy fucking shit! That's just beautiful! That's just goddamn beautiful!
7) Oh, scratching your ear? Way to go, Guide. (The guide was the head recruit. Ours was a dumb-ass dickhead from Texas)
6) When you pass our office you have your backs to us. We don't want to see your nasty fucking faces.
5) Stop, do it again.
4) I'll fuckin' kick your ass, boy. You don't fuckin' think I can. You just fuckin' try me.
3) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! Who the fuck whistled?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!? (it was me and, boy, did I pay for it)
2) "This fucking shit not that fucking hard, now is it?" "No, sir!!" "Fuckin' A, it's not."
1) Holy screaming eagle shit!!