Momma dogface banana patch

I think I am going to go straight edge. From now on the most toxic substance that will enter my body is pizza or if I fall into Sugar Creek, sewage.

Big weekend in the National Flounder Patrol. The NFP is the fantasy football league I am in that has been running now for about six or seven years with the same five person core. We've have had a few people fall in and out over the years but the NFP has maintained its identity for a while now. One season Tom even joined us. He drafted a team made up of only players that had Muslim-sounding names. He did surprisingly well. This weekend the average spread of victory between opponents was 4.5 points and no team lost by more than 6.5 points. How's that for parity?

I see that the NASCAR race at Talladega was just how the NASCAR brass likes it, full of wrecks and carnage. I swear things will not change at Talladega until someone dies. That is what it is going to take for NASCAR to get rid of restrictor plates. Just like my cable choices, if NASCAR really wanted to fix what is going on at this track they would have long ago. If they claim that restrictor plates are the best solution they are bullshitting, lying and full of shit.

I hard the last twenty minutes of the president's "press conference" this morning. I swear, hearing the softball questions these hand picked reporters toss to this guy is just shocking. They are a bunch of goddman pussies.

I am going to make a kitty highway out of 1X6's in my apartment. I figure if after so many years the bastards won't put in new carpet or paint the place then I am going to start some heavy construction. The future is now.