Dammit to hell

I heard that Anne Rice was putting a new novel out about Jesus. I got really excited. I thought maybe she would make Jesus gay (or gayer depending on your view) or a bigamist or a misunderstood atheist or maybe even a vampire. The possibilities were endless. It turns out though that she found god and is merely writing a serious novelized biobook about Jesus. Crap. I had hope there for a while.