PB & J

I used to purchase peanut butter and use it to occasionally make sammiches with it, of course. When I have a jar of peanut butter it tends to last a long time since I don't eat it very often. And because of that it's ability to last a few months on a shelf it's handy to have around when you don't feel like cooking. You can simply whup together a PB & J.

I stopped buy peanut butter a few years ago because my roommate always ate the shit up. Having a jar of peanut butter around was like leaving a can of cat food out. It's gonna get eaten exclusively until it's gone. I'd go to make a PP & J and there would be just enough peanut butter left in the jar to piss me off.

I'd say "you ate all the fucking peanut butter."

He'd say "There's some left." Complete bullshit.

"Yeah," I'd say, "there's enough left to coat the outside of the jar so that I can't see it's empty."

"Quit your bitchin'"

So I just fucking stopped buying peanut butter.

I bought peanut butter today, though, because I have a new roomate. I also bought strawberry jam. I had me a PB & J.

I should call it a PB & J and M. Because I coat the bread that the peanut butter goes on with margarine. I like the margarine and peanut butter together. I love the taste of the three textures and flavors mixing together. It's like eating cake without the very real danger of a tummy ache.