Not much is really sacred

Jesus, I hate these things.

If you really wanted to go for the heart strings you should have
had the mangled ghosts of dead Marines giving him a standing
ovation as Bob gets off a landing craft and hits the beach in
heaven. Or, maybe, he could be greeted by Bing Crosby and
Bing could say to Bob, "hurry up, Chester, we're on in ten
minutes." Oh man, that would get me all teared up fast,
Bob meeting his old friend in heaven and he's not even
unpacked and he's already got a gig booked. How cool
is that? That would really show how important Bob was
on earth by having a gig scheduled in heaven on the day
he arrived. What a talent! What a...man.

Don't get me wrong, I love Bob Hope. I just hate those
disingenuous cartoons that seem to be required now
in the opinion section of the papers.