Tuesday, January 14, 2003

An interesting twist to a sad news story

from Rhoiders:

London: Andrew Poindlinner, a attorney for Pete Townsend, has announced that Pete has admitted to having had sexual intercourse with a dog. He stated that Mr. Townsend has declared that he only copulated with the border collie mix bitch for research reasons. Poindlinner went on to say, "Mr Townsend had a dog when he was a child and he believes it may have humped his leg. For his autobiography it was necessary for him to hump his family's beloved pet so that he could move his writing project forward." Mr. Poindlinner was unable to comment on whether or not Mr. Townsend may have had any traumatic experiences at a dairy farm located near his childhood home.

VCD makin' mofo

Last night, for the first time ever, I succesfully burned a CD that would play in my DVD player. Joy joy. Unfortunately any kind of adjusting to a file that may be required takes forever on the computer I have access to at home. I'm not complaining, I didn't buy the goddamn thing, I'm happy to have it. This just allows me to steal a different form of media.

More fun at work

We often get requests for quotes from poems here in telref. Oftentimes these poems are very important to a person. Either the poem is their mother's favorite or it may include a line often quoted to the caller by her grandfather. They need the text of this poem so that they can read it aloud at the funeral or tape it to the casket or have it tattooed to their own ass. Most of these poems are crap. Either they are sentimental claptrap by poets who consider rhyming to be poetry or advertising slogans. Generally the more important the poem is to the caller the shittier the poem will be. No one has yet to call up with a quote from a Burma Shave roadside slogan but we're waiting and when that person calls we will most definately talk about them.

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