Top ten

Top ten things I heard in my dreams this week.

10. Crocogators taste like lemon toenails.
9. Let's eat our way out of the quicksand!
8. Hey, you girls, stop spanking Mr. Spock, he's got calculations to finish.
7. If Jesus can run a garter snake through both his nostrils then I can definately fuck a spitting cobra.
6. I want an inside-out pizza.
5. The best way to get Wendell off the ceiling is with a high-pressure hose.
4. Can you drown in birds?
3. I think Teddy was much sexier than FDR.
2. Does picking a dollar off a stage with your butt cheeks make you a tool user?
1. Go home and find your pants and then come back and do your live national TV spot over until you get it right.